Nothing gets in the way of a good time like life. Poor Natalie watched plans for Las Vegas and Palm Beach for her anniversary both fall through. But never one to renege, Natalie gave Pursey Galore a grand tour of Casa Del Monstruo y Las Gemelas. And I imagine that something like this MIGHT have happened…
I can’t do another thing, I just can’t can’t can’t.
This was the thought in Natalie’s head.
While scooping up one one-year-old before she ate the dog food, and herding the second with her foot before a toy ended up stuffed in the dvd player, Natalie imagined a night of fancy dress and cocktails.
Not even when it was something she wanted.
Hustling the child still on the floor with her toesshe listened for noise from the three year old playing outside. Hearing nothing more than a child making truck sounds, Natalie collected the mail.
There was a package addressed to her.
Funny, she hadn’t ordered anything recently.
She set the mail on a counter, poured goldfish crackers into a bowl, and started collecting toys in various shapes and colors of molded plastic.
The package sat forgotten under a Gymboree catalogue.
It wasn’t until the next afternoon, after wiping the last evidence of a food-flinging contest between three children from the range hood that the bubble-mailer caught her eye.
Tossing the sponge into the sink, she wiggled a finger under the flap and tore the paper.
Something sparkled at her from the darkness.
Natalie upended the mailer onto the countertop and out spilled the loudest handbag she’d ever seen in her life. Zebra-striped sequins.
It was the tackiest, most outrageously gaudy thing Natalie had ever experienced. It was nearly offensive.
It was perfect.
Natalie slipped the strap over her shoulder, then pulled a dusty martini glass from the tip-top shelf of the glass cabinet. After giving the glass a cursory rinse, she rummaged in the fridge. She discovered a can of apricot nectar hiding behind an unopened jar of tahini and poured a generous tablespoon into the martini glass. She reached over the fridge into the liquor supply and pulled out the peach schnapps and the vodka. She let a splash of the schnapps fall into the nectar, and then poured a healthy double shot of vodka over it all. She gave it a quick stir with her finger and sampled by licking the finger dry.
Pulling her sunglasses from the diaper bag, she swaggered out onto the back patio with her concoction and the glittery sequined bag. She sat down on the torn chaise lounge, stretched out her legs and sipped her drink. The purse sang happy sparkly notes to the sun.
A few minutes later her husband, holding one twin, poked his head out of the sliding glass door.
“Honey…what on earth are you doing?”
“That I am sitting next to a pool on the Riviera, that a staff of impeccably dressed waiters is fetching me tropical cocktails with clockwork regularity, and that I am dressed in the finest resort-wear ever seen by rich people,” she answered, taking another sip of the orange-colored cocktail with her eyes closed.
“Ah,” said her husband. “I see.”
Natalie smiled up at the warm sky and took a deep breath. She swung her legs over the chaise lounge and started to get up. “Okay, that was nice. Back to reality.”
Her husband crossed the patio and kissed her softly. “No, why don’t you hang out on the Riviera just a few more minutes.”
“Really?” She asked.
He nodded, “Sure. I’ll keep the peasants from troubling you for a little while longer.”
Natalie relaxed back against the chair and sipped again, letting her eyes close and her shoulders relax. “Thank you, honey. I love you.”
“Love you too, gorgeous.” He stepped back into the house. “Happy anniversary.”